A Saturday Unscheduled

    The girls caught fireflies tonight in the alley behind the house. They saved a plastic container from the farmer's market, poked holes in the top, and collected eight lightening bugs in their butterfly nets. The girls only hold the bugs for a short time before releasing them back to the urban wilderness. The night air is heavy with humidity, and their hair hangs loose, thick, and woolly over their sweaty necks.


   With stomachs full of mango slurpees, a surprise gift from The Cowboy, they trudged up the apartment stairs to build a fort in the livingroom. The cat gives constructive criticism with an arched eyebrow. A blue bedspread pulled tight over the couch and tied to my spindle-backed chairs becomes a canopy. Stuffed animals, pillows and quilts are shuttled underneath. Brave Bedoin princesses close their eyes, lids reflecting the blue light of cartoons on tv.


   The Cowboy is dressing for a late night meeting at The Republican Club, which has very little to do with political affiliation and a lot more to do with dollar beers. He asks me which shirt to wear. I choose the black, which matches his hat. He looks so handsome, and he is so excited that the energy just radiates from him. Only one more week until his first big wrestling show under the name of his own wrestling company! Things are coming together, but even his relaxation is work. He may get to drink a beer tonight, but he will be meeting with guys to discuss additional show dates and venues, concession percentages and ticket prices.


   My saturday at home was actually a treat. I tried to do as much as I could without the car, since my husband and I have to share one vehicle lately. After being away the last two weeks, it was nice to walk with the girls through my very own neighborhood, going to my spanglish-speaking bank, taking note of the cornflowers growing wild by the sidewalk, and picking up hot pretzels for the girls at the farmers' market- Younger's favorite! I treated myself to a vegetarian gyro as big as my head. We checked out the grand re-opening of the corner market. We chatted with a freckle faced kid from school. We walked over to visit some neighboring friends, observing the giant sycamore trees and the spring time rabbits nibbling on dandelion. The day was hot and the girls' cheeks were flushed.


    This is the time I get to discuss all sorts of topics with my daughters. Walking is very good for that.  "When I was a child, the autistic kid wouldn't have been in your classroom. The little girl with down's syndrome wouldn't have been in your girl scout troop. They kept people with disabilities separated from everyone else because they held things up and slowed things down. What do you think about that?" Sometimes we hold hands, and sometimes they run ahead. Overall, I think I walked about four miles. I read somewhere that people in other countries walk an average of five miles a day, just going about their normal lives. I wish my life was really set up so that I could do more without a car.


   My new year's resolution was To Relax. This is actually a real struggle for me. The goat inside this capricorn wants to be climbing the highest mountain, getting a phd, running a marathon and curing cancer all at once. I have to remind myself NOT to schedule, NOT to pressure myself, NOT to push to the absolute limit. I have given myself a year to try to learn to really relax. Taking time for walks, vegetarian gyros and chatting with freckle faced kids really feels good, for a change. 


Love and light,
your friend,
Mountain